March 16, 2010

 

All time girly crushes

As part of my ongoing effort to show everyone how not gay I am, I decided to make a list of my (FEMALE!) pop-culture crushes. It started off well, with your standard picks like Rashida Jones.

So Pretty!

Team Karen forever!





Alison Brie from Community is also good looking:




In addition to these, I was going to add Mila Kunis, but then for some reason I started thinking about how she looks like a young Linda Ronstadt. Example:



Interesting! She was very attractive! Add that to her HUGE voice and that puts her above most modern day chicks I can think of.

Here she is singing with Johnny Cash. Sign me up!



AND SO, that gave me an idea to write an all-time list of hot girls regardless of their respective places on the space/time continuum.

HERE THEY ARE:

1. Ellen Barkin:



Until recently, I only knew this lady as the one with way too much plastic surgery who gets seduced by Matt Damon in Ocean's 13. However, I happened to see The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the Eighth Dimension recently, starring Peter Weller. (PETER WELLER, WHO LATER BECAME THE LEGENDARY ROBOCOP!)

It's an incredibly bizarre movie with stilted dialog and a nonsensical plot...yet I really liked it. I probably couldn't convince anyone to sit through the whole thing with me, but just trust me on this one. It's the good kind of awful.

The thing is, Ellen Barkin was actually really pretty and unique looking when she was young! Good job young Ellen Barkin! Here's the trailer:





2. Stevie Nicks

Ok so, Stevie Nicks was really hot in the mid seventies. I can see why the whole band wanted to commit adultery with her. Well done mid-seventies Stevie Nicks! Sorry about your cocaine addiction! (Not really.)






3. Jennifer Connelly

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "HEY JENNIFER CONNELLY ISN'T THAT OLD YOU JERK. WHAT KIND OF JERK ARE YOU?"

I know! She's not very old, and she's still very good looking!

HOWEVER MY FRIENDS, I maintain that Jennifer Connelly circa 1991 in The Rocketeer was probably the most attractive person of all time. PROOF:



4. Emmylou Harris:

Whoops! So many musicans! Sorry guyz, I can't control it. I'm like a male version of those girls who think any guy who can sing is attractive. Does anyone know a girl who can play the autoharp? I'll propose on the spot!

Double whoops! Now that I've looked up some photos, I think Emmylou Harris is actually better looking as an older lady with silver hair.





See...right?

Actually, I think I might have overshared on this one.

In conclusion: Great job attractive ladies! You really are quite attractive!

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Comments:
Even I have a crush on mid-seventies Stevie Nicks.
 
No Meryl Streep? Queer.
 
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