The Death of Enthusiasm

I have now moved into a new apartment for the school year, which I am actually quite ready for. (Working 8 hour days in a job you can barely tolerate will do that to you, I guess.)

I think I'll remember my old apartment forever, because:

A) I lived there for over a year

B) It was a social black hole, and all the doors were kicked in

and

C)It was here where I had a late night encounter with evil encarnate

Let me explain.

One night about a week ago, I was about to go to bed when I heard some strange noises coming from my windowsill. I pulled up the blinds to investigate and all of the sudden a HUGE, GREEN, TERRIFYING DEMON OF THE NIGHT flew directly at my face. I know it is "just" a Katydid, otherwise known as a "bush cricket" in the UK, but I was already half asleep, and the sight of it flying directly at my face was more than I could take.

The problem was, the thing would not fly out my window no matter how much I tried to direct it there. It was more interested in eating my eyeballs, apparently. I was forced to make a grim decision. I closed the window. Only one of us would survive the night.

At first I tried to whip it to death with a dirty sock, but this proved too harmless. (I should have filled it with quarters.)

Searching for a more effective method, I found my weapon in the empty room across the hall. It was a gleaming golden samurai sword of some sort. (See image above).

I silently stalked my prey and found it perched on top of my closet door. Taking a deep breath, I swung my sword as hard as I possibly could, only about 30% percent sure that I would actually strike the target.

After I swung I looked around to see where the devil-bug had gone to, but I couldn't find it anywhere. I had become Darth Vader, and I had sliced right through my own personal Obi-Wan Kenobi, making him more powerful than I could ever imagine.

It turns out the bug was wedged in between some of my shirts, it's wings splayed out like a freakish, tiny green turkey.

I flushed down the foul beast down the toilet and went to bed knowing that I had made my room safe for freedom loving people everywhere.